Contemplating a Half-Century Birthday, in Stockholm
Nearly a Year Ago
Nearly a year ago, I realized that I was living the last year of my forties. Since I somehow still think I'm in my thirties, I wasn't sure how to handle this.
I’d always wanted to spend every summer in Sweden. But at nearly fifty, simply wishing to spend every summer in Sweden had clearly not made it happen. There was no more time to waste.
I booked a flat for my birthday month.
So I’m Watching the Midnight Sun
The midnight sun is glowing in the 11:06 pm (23:06) sky, which I’m watching from an attic rooftop as I do what I try to do the day before every birthday: find gratitude for the year that has been, before it ends.
Because instead of feeling disbelief that time will not stand still (how is it possible that I’m this age?), I know I should instead feel grateful that I (still) exist.
Thus, in the Last Moments of My Forties, I’m So Grateful for…
being born into this absolute wonder
understanding how some struggles exist
protecting ourselves with love
meaningful connection
kindness